Stories hard to teach in children's bible class

Genesis 9:18-28

OK- what I get from this passage application-wise is pretty simple- honor your father...even if he's drunk and naked.

This is a weird story that has seemingly always puzzled me. Noah gets drunk and is laying around minus his clothes- Ham (quite an unfortunate name- especially if he was a heavy kid) stumbles in and sees him- spreads the news- and is consequentially cursed.

Something I noticed for the first time- the footnote in the NIV says that verse 20 could read that Noah "was the first to plant a vineyard." So- perhaps Noah was unaware of the intoxicating nature of his drink? Had no clue that to drink too much might make him a bit goofy? Or is there a lesson here about the nature of God's attitude toward alcohol.

I've been raised to believe that alcohol is the root of evil and to have it cross your lips is sin- despite the whole first miracle of Jesus thing. Does this maybe show a priority from God between respect and drunkeness?

The curse doesn't come from God though- it comes from Noah- maybe they're both at fault- Noah, embarassed and hung-over (the first? ahh- what an honor) lashes out at the son who thought his nakedness was amusing.

Speaking of the whole nakedness thing...what exactly is going on here? What did Ham actually do? It seems like a pretty steep penalty for "seeing" your father naked- the haunting image would be punishment enough. Maybe he made fun of his father's anatomy? Jana read a novelization of the account that spins it as Noah being in a state of drunken arousal that Ham was amused by. "Who'd have thought the old man could still make that happen" kind of thing. Or is it even more sinister and there's some kind of creepy inbred homosexual thing going on that translators are too gentle to translate with specificity. It all just seems a bid weird.

Finally- how about this curse? He doesn't curse Ham- he curses Canaan (which I assume is Ham's son- not the nation. This is even more harsh- and seems really unfair. Is there any lesson for us here?

Thanks for making it through this icky passage with me. Tomorrow looks less seedy, but unfortunately a bit more boring.

Peace,
Chip