She Turned Me Into a Newt

Numbers 5:11-31

A rare passage in Numbers that I find fascinating. Disturbing and odd, but fascinating.

So, if a man suspected his wife of being unfaithful- there was a sure fire test to determine her guilt. It sounds like it comes straight out of the Salem witch trials. He is to bring his wife (and a grain offering of barley flour) to the priest. The grain offering is because of jealousy.

The priest mixes some holy water with dust from the tabernacle floor. He loosens her hair and puts the dust water (in a clay jar) into her hands. He holds onto some bitter water. He puts her under oath... I'm not sure what she had to put her hand on to make this happen- and says the following to her:

""If no other man has slept with you and you have not gone astray and become impure while married to your husband, may this bitter water that brings a curse not harm you. ²⁰ But if you have gone astray while married to your husband and you have defiled yourself by sleeping with a man other than your husband... may the LORD cause your people to curse and denounce you when he causes your thigh to waste away and your abdomen to swell.²² May this water that brings a curse enter your body so that your abdomen swells and your thigh wastes away."

I'm not sure what the oath was for, since the woman isn't asked any questions regarding her guilt or innocence. She is supposed to say "Amen. So be it."

The priest writes the curse down and washes the words off into the bitter water and gives it to the woman to drink. So the curse literally enters the woman's body. Then the priest burns the grain offering and the woman drinks the holy water that he was holding.

The result will be a wasting thigh, which sounds a little like leprosy to me- and the inability to have children. If she bears a child, she is innocent and cleared of all charges.

This seems like it's all set-up for problems. What if a woman was already unable to bear children- is she then to pay the penalty for adultery? What if the husband shoots blanks? Maybe God wouldn't allow this scenario to take place.

What about a man who refrains from sex with his wife because he assumes she has been sleeping around and he's still hurt over the whole thing? Seems like that might prevent the birth of a child, too.

Sadly interesting that there is no scenario to punish a man who falsely accuses his wife. It seems like if she is found innocent the scene is more like "oops, my bad."

There's also not much room here for grace. We aren't told about a woman's ability to plead her case. What about rape? Or just a mistake? Can there be no reconciliation?

And why wouldn't a guilty woman just confess instead of going through this process? Just to buy her a little more time before she's found guilty? Does she think maybe there's a way out in the meantime? Maybe she doubts God's power to make the curse work?

This passage seems to illustrate God's hand in the administering of justice. If nothing else, it shows that God's not too fond of adultery. And while it seems like God is making sure justice occurs- I'd much rather have grace.

The Impossible Dream

Numbers 5:5-10

God tells Moses that when someone wrongs someone else in any way, that person is guilty and must confess his sin. He must make financial atonement for the sin adding one-fifth of the value to make up for it. If the wronged person has no close relative (I guess assuming the innocent party has died) the restitution belongs to God and goes to the priest- with the addition of a ram used for atonement. He ends with "Each man's sacred gifts are his own, but what he gives to a priest will belong to the priest." I'm not sure what to make of the distinction.

This is an issue that ties me in knots over and over. There are so many elements that make this hard to deal with.

First, you have to be aware of the sins committed. If they unknowingly wronged someone, were they condemned simply because they didn't realize their actions? Or is this part of the command more about a refusal to humble self and bend will? I realize I've sinned, but I won't admit it.

Second, every wrong demands restitution. So does that mean if I tell you a story and exaggerate a detail, suddenly now I owe you money and must confess my sin? What financial value gets placed on non-financial sins? Does every sin demand restitution?

Third, what about sins that happened so long ago, the details are fuzzy. I have so many of these memories and they eat me up. Am I supposed to look up people from my past and let them know sketchy details of how I wronged them a decade ago? Do their puzzled looks and awkward responses somehow make something better? Is this really what God wants?

Fourth, who is the confession made to? When he says every sin is confessed, does that mean confessed to God? To the person you sinned against? To another person who can pray for you? To a priest?

Fifth, are there times when confession can make things worse? If a person doesn't realize a wrong, can an apology hurt someone's feelings or hurt a relationship? If I apologize for harsh comments when a person thought I was joking, has my confession caused more harm?

Sixth, when does it end? For every ancient, inconsequential wrong I can dig up and try to apologize for, I can think up two more. Is this to be my life's work?

But the two most important questions in my mind:

One, is this what God wanted? It kind of seems like He's talking about confessing to the actual person wronged- except that he talks about the no-close relative clause. Certainly in those instances such confession was impossible. Was it even desired?

Two, is this what God wants for us? Is the principle more, as I sin, be aware of who I've hurt and when possible and beneficial, confess to them? Always confess to God, but not in a legalistic if I don't remember every one I'm going to Hell kind of way.

I once had a conversation with a friend about trying to go back and amend for a complicated wrong from years ago. It would have involved hunting down someone I had only met a few times who lived in a different state. His comment was "that's what Jesus is for"(Or something like that).

And hopefully that's the key. We have Jesus' blood to cover us. I don't need to live in constant dread because I have a handful of wrongs I can think of that I've never made amends for.

And if that's not the case, it's gonna be a long road. I better look up my college friend who I haven't spoken to in a decade and let him know that I lied about why I wanted to borrow his car.

Long road, indeed.

Dishonorable Discharge
Numbers 5:1-4

God tells Moses to oust people who make the camp unclean. These include people we talked about before: contagious skin desease carriers, anyone who has a "discharge" of any kind, or anyone made unclean by contact with a dead body. Much of this was covered back in Leviticus 13.

This may qualify as one of the world's worst jobs. "Excuse me, I'm checking for skin diseases...any discharges I should know about?"

Two things of note here- God isolates them. He gives them a little direction for re-purification procedures back in Leviticus 21- but at least for now- they're not to be physically part of the camp. God apparently treats the camp as holy, and imperfections have no place.

However, this next phrase says a lot. He wants them out of the camp- beyond defiling range "where I will be with them." He doesn't desert them. He's there on the journey back to purification.

When we're in that state- he does no less. When I mess up (over and over...and over), I'm still His child, He's still my Dad. I'm not banished from His presence. He takes us as we are and loves us in every state we're in.

Festering sores and all.

Feel Like a Number

Numbers 4: 34-49

This section is low on plot and interesting insight. Basically- Moses and Aaron follow through with the census commanded earlier. Before you keel over in anticipation- here are the results.

They only counted men between 30-50 years of age- working age for whatever their clan was assigned to.

2,750 Kohathites

2,630 Gershonites

3,200 Merarites

8,580 total. You can check it with your calculator.

Once again- it could have just worked out that way- but fairly round numbers for all three- especially for the Merarites. I don't know if these numbers are approximations or handled by the anal retentive. I'm not sure what difference it makes.

I'm also not sure what to take from this section. Maybe the idea that while at times we are significant individually in the work we do- sometimes what matters more is that we become part of a group larger than ourselves and pursue God's work.

Or maybe just that Numbers is boring.

See Previous Post

Numbers 4:29-33

This section seems to be a slight variation on the last one. The names have been changed to protect the boring.

Another census- this time to see how many Merarites there are frame-carrying age. Ithamar continues his power trip assigning the specific tasks. No Blazzar! I said you carry the northwest corner tent pegs! C'mon...listen!

The Merarites are in charge of lugging frames, posts, bases and the like.

It strikes how arbitrary this all is. Hmm, now the Merarites seem naturally inclined to be post people... keep them away from the curtains. You know how they are around curtains.

This is not assignment based on skill, or likely even on merit. This is an organizational attmept to make sure everything gets done. Because of my fabric expertise, I might be more inclined to cover the table, but since I'm a Merarite, I'm not put in that position, even though I know in my heart I could serve better there. Carrying crossbars is my lot.

In the same way that arbitrary things like your family name, notoriety, or economic status open doors for some, they close them for others. This isn't saying life should work this way- it just does. If I'm a Merarite, I can dream all day of being a Gershonite- but I'm still carrying posts.

I'm not suggesting that a person can't break through unfair circumstances- but maybe understanding that sometimes my position has nothing to do with who I am, but instead criteria beyond my control can help me deal with the situation I'm in. Post carrying isn't always a punishment. If I don't view it as such, maybe I can better deal with my self-worth whether I like my job or not.

Carry On My Gershonite Son

Numbers 4: 21-28

Short section about the group assigned the duty of lugging stuff related to: "the care of the tabernacle and tent, its coverings, the curtain at the entrance to the Tent of Meeting, 3:²⁶ the curtains of the courtyard, the curtain at the entrance to the courtyard surrounding the tabernacle and altar, and the ropes—and everything related to their use."

And that's really all there is to it. Aaron's son Ithamar (who sounds like he had lisping parents) was in charge of assigning them specific tasks. They lugged around curtains and sea-cow hide. This was their sacred assignment.

It would be easy to feel a little less than important if your task for God was simply carrying around curtains- like you were nothing more than the flunky for a spiritual interior designer.

Maybe what we can learn from the Gershonites (besides the benefit of taking claim of the legal right of name changing) is to be content with your "calling." I'm not really comfortable with that word, though I hear it used often enough. But simply put, whatever position you find yourself in regarding service to God, be it with or without status or prestige- find the value. The guy that mows the lawn at the church building is important (and not likely to be me). The person who volunteers childcare, the person who shows kindness to neighbors, the political activist speaking for the voiceless, the international missionary, the mother teaching her child to read, the guy making dinner for a family going through hard times, the guy carrying the curtain... are all important. Whatever you figure out to do... find the value in it- and own it.

Carry the curtain, wayward son. There'll be peace when you are done.

Got it Covered

Numbers 4: 1-20

So as we learned way back in Numbers 3, the Kohathites were in charge of "the care of the ark, the table, the lampstand, the altars, the articles of the sanctuary used in ministering, the curtain, and everything related to their use."

Moses is to take a second census- this time to see how many Kohathite males are between 30-50 years old who are able to serve in this capacity. I'm not sure what makes these ages magic- maybe they wanted to make sure the workers were old enough to take it seriously and young enough to not be as apt to drop something. Because when you hit 50...

So, Aaron and his sons are to cover everything- the ark with the shielding curtain, hides of sea-cows, and blue cloth; the table of presence with a blue cloth, then the plates, cups, etc., then a scarlet cloth and then sea-cow hides; lampstands and accessories get covered with blue cloth and then wrapped in sea-cow hides; gold altar gets the blue cloth, sea-cow hide treatment as do the ministering articles. The Bronze altar gets its ashes removed and a purple cloth placed over it- then its utensils get placed on it and its covered with the sea-cow hide. All poles are also put in place.

They must have had quite a collection of sea-cow hide.

Once Aaron and Aaron-spawn finish this task, the Kohathites do the lugging. That's right boys, you were chosen- but chosen for grunt work. Congratulations. The covering must be thorough- if the Kohathites touch anything directly, they will die. In fact, it says at the end of this section that if they even look at the holy things, even for a moment, they will die.

Aaron's son, Eleazar, is put in charge of the tabernacle and of everything in it- things like oil and certain offerings are singled out.

God tells them to make sure that the Kohathites aren't cut off from the other Levites. This is a little puzzling- what about this work would cut them off? It seems to have something to do with the sacredness of the work, because He follows up with precautions about contact with the holy items. Aaron's sons are to assign who carries what and the Kohathites carefully carry with their eyes closed and their breath held... just in case. Oh maybe not, eyes closed might heighten the chance of messing up.

This is all a little odd to me. Why all the ceremony surrounding these items. I guess that paying this much respect to them kept them and the ceremony surrounding them fresh and special. It would be hard to sleepwalk through service if you knew it might mean death- although I would suspect that at some point it would reach a monotonous state anyhow.

The emphasis seems to be- these things are holy... you are not- so keep away from them. This seems a bit demeaning- it would be easy to get a complex, feeling like you weren't even good enough to be in the presence of God's dishes- but maybe the reaction should be the opposite- even though you're full of sin- even though you rarely get it right- even though you aren't holy... I love you anyway- you are still My children.